Thankful on a Thursday

Or a Friday, yesterday got away from me. Take a minute and think what are you thankful for today.
For our house that over the last year has become our home there is nothing like a quiet evening at home with my little family.  I am so thankful for our home.
For my grandparents who will celebrate 60+ years of marriage this weekend. At a glance you might wonder if they were newly-weds, they have never stopped holding hands or reminding the other how much they care for each other. I am so thankful to have such a wonderful picture of marriage to strive for. 
 
A year ago we introduced our son to the great wonder of the ocean. Our little boy got to touch sand and feel the water for the first time on the very beach we got married on. I am so thankful for that day.
 
 And for no longer being the puffy postpartum monster, the difference of a year is truly amazing. 
 
Wonderful date nights at home. Baby in bed early, appetizers, steak on the grill, a glass or two of wine and homemade cupcakes. Who needs to go out for dinner when you can have a night like that in the comfort of your own home. I am thankful for those nights.
My husband who offered to work from home so that I could take an afternoon to myself and go spend way to much on a hair appointment and buy a new dress. I am thankful for the man who worked hard all day to make the money to pay for us to have a nice life and his willingness for me to spoil myself every once in awhile. 

Let’s start a revolution

Can us Mommas please take a moment and chill out? No seriously, can we please stop judging one another, spend more time worrying about our own kids and stop obsessing over what others do?

Mom Bitches please hush, no one cares what you think and your demeaning attitude is rude and makes people defensive. I am well aware that have read every parenting book on the market and feel that it is the word of God telling you how to raise a perfect child. I can assure you my child is not perfect in any one’s eyes other than my own and I don’t buy half the stuff out there. I could care less that you only breast fed, never gave your child food before 6 months and feel that it is unhealthy for a baby to sleep through the night. I am very proud of you for being the best mom you can be and will never judge you… so please refrain from judging me. I am doing my very best and I am OK with it.

On a daily basis, I read really rude comments on other people’s blog posts. Like this adorable letter one blogger wrote to her mom. This blogger points out the worst of the mean comments and there are some really ugly comments. I have to say I agree with her. The meanness baffles me. Please calm down. I do not need the facts screamed at me. I read too, I also choose what I believe based on their medical degrees. And sometimes, I just don’t care and do what I think is best.

I am, also, faced with these rude women in real life, like the day when someone told me my child was too skinny and if I was still breastfeeding him then he would weigh more. Really?? Do I know you? If I did, you would know I was living with my in-laws in a not happy place when my milk came in and then I moved 3 weeks later and had never felt more alone in my life. I was miserable and my milk was water. Guess what, he wasn’t gaining weight then either so per doctor’s request I supplemented and then I gave up. Will I breast fed my next child? Most likely. Will I do it longer if it works? Probably. Do I care at all if you do or don’t? Nope. It’s your body and your kid, not mine.

I really want to start a revolution of women that support regardless of views. Women who love other women for being the best mothers that they know how to be and not concern themselves with their choices. Cause you know what, motherhood is hard work. We need each other, especially other moms because we get it. We have been there.

I love myself some formula, hated how much it cost, loved making my own baby food, cloth diaper and spend every day trying to be the best mother I can. I love my kid with all my heart and try really hard to make sure my husband knows I love him more every day. I strive daily to be the best wife and mom I can. But you know what only I can define what that means.

So anyone want to join me on my quest to always be a supporter and never a hater?

I almost gave up

I wasn’t going to write a McFatty post this week. I was kind of sick of thinking about my weight, my husband told me that I was one dimensional and that’s the only thing I talked about and lets be honest it is really hot outside. Then out of habit I started reading some of the other ladies on the McFatty quest and started to think.

Alena @Charming Chandler talked about just doing it (losing the weight) and stop talking about it.
Earth to LA does that sound like you? While pregnant I constantly said when I get cleared for exercise I will join weight watchers and train for a 1/2 marathon. Did I do either one of those things? Nope.

Then Jacqueline @MarblesRolling wrote a post I could have written myself, absent the actively trying for number 2. We are still talking about when to start. I have many fears about not going ahead and pounding out the kids. I have one kidney have been told that with every year I wait the more stress my body will go through and the more likely something will happen with my health. So part of me wants to have more now and part of me is yelling “No, no, no” get that weight down before you even think about it. She talked about learning to love your body, and more specifically your new body because ::news flash:: pregnancy changes things and not everything goes back to normal. My body literally changed overnight, my previous ridiculously narrow hips became normal. And I can run all I want, those bones aren’t moving.  I have a memory of what I looked like July 2008 and I have set that as the standard. I think, I need to learn to be realistic and to set smaller goals.

So here I am today, not overly sure what step to take or what to think. But learning that my weight does not define me as person, that I talk a lot more than act and maybe I would do myself a world of good to give away a lot of clothes made for a body that I do not own anymore.

Anyone want to join me in the Couch to 5k? I will via email hold you accountable.

Bye-Bye

Baby Boy has a favorite word… “Bye Bye” and its usually coupled with a wave. We spent months teaching him how to do it and he would get such a fantastic reaction that I think we have trained him to do it for the reaction only. For example…

Momma- “STOP. No, no don’t pull on that cord!”

Baby Boy- ::wave:: “Bye, bye Momma” ::huge grin::

 or 

Momma- “No, no, NO put that down.

Baby Boy- ::in mid-run with said object:: “Bye, bye”

He knows just how cute he is too. It is most definitely a parenting fail on our part.

Thankful on a Thursday

I will choose to be Thankful on this Thursday, that even though life seems unfair. I will not let others choices in life steal my happiness. So sit back and think what moments this week have reminded you of the sweetness of life.

A little boy with strawberry blonde hair that loves his Momma, for every moment that he is a Momma’s boy I am thankful.

A belly laugh followed by a slight snort as I chase him around the room, for that happiness I am thankful.

A husband that doesn’t care that the house could be cleaner and the fridge is empty and will eat pizza over and over again because right now getting it together is too much for me, for that heart I am thankful.

Orange roses that remind me of our first moments as a couple especially when they arrive as a surprise combined with a bear hug from the man who loves me I am so very thankful.

Hot, hot coffee in the morning when the house is quiet and the day has just begun for that moment to start my day I am thankful.

A steadfast family that cares and always loves. For them I am thankful.

What are you thankful for?

The dark side of being Mom

Life can sneak up on you and explode sometimes. A phone call, a knock on the door, letter… something happens and the ball drops and that moment of bliss pauses and you wonder is this really happening?

Sometimes you wake up and wonder how did we get here?

My baby brother is a heroin addict. This amazingly smart young man has spent the better part of the last five spiraling out of control has he fell deeper into his own demons. 8 months ago our family figured it out and we got him help. My parents found the best rehab money could buy, shipped him off and my mother traveled 7 hours each way weekly to attend family therapy.

She was his angel, she was his mother. She stopped her life and focused on him. The family banned together and rallied him on. We knew he could do it; he was too smart to loose his life to his addictions.

We were wrong, his first month with any freedom, with any hope of responsibility he found himself right back to where he started. I can’t wrap my brain around his addictions, its beyond me. I kills me to think that my little love is loosing his uncle to this illness. That we, as a family, are being robbed of his presence because of drugs.

I watch my baby run around and wonder what will our struggles be. Will I have to stand by and watch him ruin his life? Will I be able to do it, will it kill me? You are a parent the rest of your life and sometimes your children choose a path you cannot join them on. Its scary sometimes to realize that our babes will grow and have a path to live and all we can do is hope and pray that their life is the one we dreamed for them. No mother dreams of the bad. Tonight lets say a prayer for the mother’s that loved their kids through the real bad and in the end still lost.

Warning

Welcome Monday, get excited. Take a deep breathe. Ready or not just go.

It is time to suck it back up and get back on the wagon of weight loss. Yes, I have given myself a free pass for weeks to eat what I want and drink what I want. Seriously, I made it through one full year of parenthood and it was so good that I am getting to point where I think I may be ready to do it again. But, before we can discuss that I have a few pesky pounds to destroy.

My mid section is sporting a good inch of spare tire and it must exit the building. I need to firm up those legs, arms and butt. I need the motivation to return to my former self. I need to look in the mirror  and say “Hello LA welcome back, you have been missed”.  So here goes nothing McFatty bandwagon. I am back and ready to rumble.

Here’s to a week of getting my butt up EARLY and hitting the pavement. Me and my IPOD have a date and hopefully in a week you will hear me rant and rave about how I beat the heat and got in my run early.

I am holding each and everyone of you accountable to calling my butt out if I don’t do it. So if you are reading this consider yourself warned, LA needs some accountability and you are expected to do it.  Please & thank you.

Thankful on Thursday

 
Everyday I wake and choose to be thankful for my love, for the man who works everyday for me, for his family. He carries my heart and is life to me. From quiet nights with wine on our porch to laying in bed laughing and playing Scrabble. He holds me up when I am weak and cheers me on as I dream. For this man I am thankful for.  

I am thankful for the family we made. In spite of the twists and turns in the road, we paved our way. We formed our family. I am thankful for our dreams and the mystery of the future.
I am thankful for the father-son bond that grows with each passing day. I am thankful that my child was blessed with strong and steadfast father.

I am thankful for my very best friend and the love of my life.


I am thankful for family who stopped their lives to join us as we celebrated the wonder of a baby who came to us.

I am thankful for 5 women who entered my life when we were just girls. Who blessed me with entangling their lives with mine and no matter the distance nothing changes. Old friends, dear friends… their stability and encouragement will forever be an inspiration to me.

Fashion Sense?

How many of you spent at least a moment in of your pre-momma days pontificating on how you were not going to be a frumpy mom? I am pretty sure I made a snide comment about Juicy Jogging Suits when it suddenly became the new Mom uniform. I swore up and down that I would never wear ANYTHING but low rise pants. And even pregnant I refused to wear most maternity clothes because they were frumpy and I was entirely too young for them. No thank you, keep your awkwardly large V-necked tops to yourself.

And then baby boy was born. And the first 6 months of his life happened. There were days when my hubby told me I smelled, asked when the last time I showered, I wore the same two or three outfits every day and when my mom bought me a juicy jogging suit I was ecstatic. On impulse, I dyed my hair back to its natural lite brown color, chopped it all off and forgot I owned make-up. That was a very bad idea, I am pretty sure my bleak outlook on life had something to do with the fact I avoided mirrors, the appearance was too much to handle. I was my own worst nightmare.

Suddenly, I started to feel better, I turned the hurdle on weight and it started to come off. I spent WAY too much at my former amazing hair stylist to get her to return my hair to its previous state and rediscovered make-up. I felt so much better.

Somewhere in the year of lost fashion, things turned weird. Recently, I was out at bar with some friends, I turned to the girls and said “did I miss something what is going on with trendy clothes?” I used to pride myself on my fashion sense but I am so not wearing those clothes. I mean really fanny packs? Coach or not, that is a don’t in my book.

So here I am, a Mom. I wear my juicy running suits and running skirts most days. I sport shape-ups because they make legs burn and every little bit helps and thank god I am blond again. I like my day wear, I actually don’t think its all that bad but when it come to date night, playdates with friends or girls night out. I am at a loss, what do I wear? I want to blend, I want to be cute, I am so confused on what to wear. I don’t want to look like a time warp from 2005.

What have you done, to bridge the gap from young, hot single clothes to mom, married trendy clothes? Where do you shop? What’s your favorite?

For the first time in my life I regret to inform you..I need a makeover!

please help,
Reel Momma

A letter to my son

Dear Baby Boy,

I know that your little month was mean and waited 11 whole months to start pushing teeth through. I know cutting 4 and 5 teeth at time is terrible pain. Trust me your Momma aches for you and would stop the pain if I could. Instead, I promise to keep the Motrin and cold foods to gnaw on flowing. In return could you do me a favor?

PLEASE. STOP. GAGING. YOURSELF.

I am sick you smelling like vomit, cleaning it up off you and the floor. I am sick of feeling like a mom fail when you do it in public. Besides, its gross especially when you try to play in said vomit. Future girlfriends will laugh and you will be very embarrassed when these stories are told, trust me.

All my love,
Your Momma